In The Fire

"Take me with you," I whispered to my husband as he departed for a business trip a few days ago. Part of me was excited for him and the other part envious. I was jealous he got to venture to a new country, even though it was work related. "He's going to try new foods and see sites I never have while I look at the same four walls, listen to children bicker and figure out what to make for dinner again," I shamefully thought.

Let me rewind just a bit. My husband and I have been married a little over 3 months. 4 months ago I had a picture in my head of what our lives would look like. Visions of fields of wild flowers colored my imagination as we gleefully ran into the sunset. I guess a lifetime of Hallmark and Disney movies helped prompt those daydreams. But, real life has a way of waking us up very quickly. As soon as we married, the storms began to hit. So much so it seems all areas of our lives have been tested. From appliances repeatedly breaking to kid troubles to drama from exes to identity crisises. There are times we'll look at one another and jokingly say "we made it through another one" and times we'll tearfully say "how much more can we take."

Which brings me to this current business trip he is on. We'd been praying about it for weeks since we knew he was going to be leaving. Asking God to help things run smoothly but it's been anything but. One child got sick, followed by the second and then a third. Our microwave caught fire and we've been living out of a cooler for a month since our refrigerator's been broken. I went to pick up a sick kid from school and my car wouldn't start. And, as I type this, we still have two more days to go until he gets back home. This isn't a woe is me pity party or at least that's not my intention. What I want to convey are the lessons God is teaching me in a class I like to call - In The Fire 101.

This class is one we've all had at some point or another. Let me explain. Most of our days are spent around the campfire, so to speak. We're surrounded by family and friends. There's always some heat in the middle, also known as problems, but we tackle them and sit back down with our marshmallows until the heat gets too hot. Every so often, that fire starts to burn out of control when we are faced with too many issues all at once. We feel alone, swarmed by flames and smoke that threaten to spontaneously combust us. We learn at an early age to stop, drop and roll in a fire. However, God is teaching me to Stop, Drop and Grow.

What it seems I am constantly learning is to:

Stop filling my calendar with activities that I don't make time for Him.
Stop fixating on myself and my problems.
Stop thinking I am in control.

Instead...

Drop to my knees and bask in God's presence.
Drop my selfishness and gaze on God. Then, help others.
Drop my pride and pick up the humility of knowing His plans are perfect no matter how much they hurt.

By doing these things, the Lord allows us to grow in our maturity and walk with Him. As we do so, we are able to brace ourselves in the blaze. We become stronger and so do our marriages. The relief comes when we realize God is with us in the fire just like He was with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego who stood untouched by the heat in the fiery furnace. Jesus Christ is our balm when the sparks have grazed our skin. He breathes life and pieces us back together when all we feel is left are ashes.

No, life normally doesn't go as planned. This side of Heaven will always produce pain. But look around. Who has he placed beside you to help alleviate it? He's given me the greatest gift and answered prayer who is my husband. One thing I have quickly learned in our short marriage is it is far better to suffer with someone than to suffer alone.

A side note-God not only wants His children to come to Him when we are standing in the inferno but he wants a relationship all the time. Let us remember that the next time we are sitting around the campfire enjoying the warmth and telling stories. Hmm...I can't help but wonder if God likes marshmallows.?

Father in Heaven,
Thank you for the trials you send my way to keep me humble and constantly reaching for your hand. Help me to withstand them so I grow closer to you and more like you. Thank you for the smooth days that allow me to exhale and remind me of all I have to be grateful for. Thank you for the people you have sent to walk alongside me through life. Help me never to take them for granted.  In Jesus' name, Amen.

Paralyzed by Busyness

The clock read 8:45 a.m. By then, the kids were dressed, had eaten breakfast and been taken to school. Two loads of laundry were done, Bible read, prayers sent and the grocery list written. I glanced at the empty coffee mug and knew I needed a double dose of Joe and Jesus. The bags under my eyes and frown upon my face were a telltale sign I needed to stop and slow down.

I'm not good at slow. It means I have more time to focus on all I need to be doing but it also points out what I've been ignoring. Busy work is unavoidable. We check off our to do's and before we know it, the day has slipped away from us. Doing so makes it easy to drown out God's whispers. For weeks I'd had the same prayer: "Lord, help me balance my time wisely so I can keep up with housework and homework and still do what I love-write."

I like keeping a tidy house. I enjoy making hot meals for my family (especially when they eat them) but to sit quietly before God as the pen flows on paper revitalizes me and brings a sense of fulfillment that can't be matched. To make time for something that brings gratification seems like it would be a no-brainer. Just add it on the calendar. However, oftentimes, I will put it on the back burner. Pretty soon that hot passion within will turn cold and leaves me with feelings of disappointment and dissatisfaction.

Busy isn't bad unless it constantly overshadows what God want wants to do in and through us. I'm not saying He doesn't want us to cook and clean. One of the greatest ways to show our family Christ in the flesh is to serve them through these acts of love. But, when we have certain desires within, burdens that keep us up at night, messages to share through communicating the gospel then it is not enough to simply ask God for more time to accomplish these.  Proverbs 14:23 says all hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads to poverty.  We must be prepared to put in work to get it done and not let ourselves be paralyzed by busyness.

The routine, day in and day out schedules, though chaotic, are often easier because their familiar. It's the action steps we take behind our knee deep in tears prayers that are often hard and uncomfortable. We'll tell ourselves "someday I will pursue that dream." "I don't have enough time right now." "I'm not good/smart/young enough." Whatever excuse you can think of, I've said it. I've talked myself out of quitting numerous things and regret most of them. The tasks the Lord gives me that I continue to strive for are the ones I'm proud of. Whether they take 5 weeks or 5 years.

Those who have accepted Christ as their personal savior, have the power of the Holy Spirit burning inside of them. He has placed fires of desire in us and I believe He takes great delight when His children actively pursue Him so He can ignite those. Whether you are a nine to five employee who wants to stay at home with your little ones. Or, you stay at home but volunteer for so many things and you simply need a time of rest.  Maybe you want to take a few classes or start your own business.  Whatever it is, God is with you. It doesn't mean you won't stumble, but, if we don't become weary in doing good, we will reap a harvest if we don't give up. (Galatians 6:9)

Action steps:
Take time to learn about this man we call Jesus and ask Him to reveal Himself to you. Talk to Him in prayer and when you do, allow every insecurity, fear, hurt, longing and dream to pour out. Ask Him to help you manage your time to be able to pursue all He has for you boldly.

When Life Doesn't Go as Planned

We eagerly sat down with buttered popcorn in one hand and a ginormous Diet Coke in the other. Those first three minutes in the theater were wonderful. Plush seats, junk food and loud surround sound was the perfect entertainment for a Friday night. By minute four, a series of questions were ushered in. "Mommy, what's that man doing in the movie?" "Can I have more snacks?" "May I go to the bathroom?" All these questions were nestled between food that was spilled on the floor and kids that got up and down out of their seat. On top of all this, the long awaited movie could've waited until its debut at Redbox.

I chuckle as I think about one of our first movie outings as a family, but, isn't this how real life goes? We have a picture perfect vision of how our lives end up.We predict which college we'll attend, job we'll take, person we'll marry and children we'll have. Most of us are filled with anticipation until our things don't turn out how we expect them to. Such as:

The highschool senior who talks of the grand career they want to have but other choices take them down a difficult road that makes college appear as a far fetched idea.

The college graduate whose forked out enough money, blood, sweat and tears to earn their diplomas only to be rejected by every company they apply for.

The single whose one desire is to be married but has been in the dating scene so long their fairly certain their upcoming Saturday night date is with someone they already went out with last year.

The couple who have been to an infertility doctor so many times their wondering if they should have their own room there. Or, the mom and dad who once held a child in their arms have to open those same arms to bury their son or daughter.

How do we remain hopeful when all our dreams and aspirations seem to crumble at our feet?

This reminds me of Paul in the Bible. Paul, who walked a path of religious extremism and wanted to eradicate Christians, was one day suddenly converted. Paul was a chosen instrument and preached the good news on many missions. He also wrote many books in the New Testament. He suffered, was imprisoned and evidence suggests was martyred for his faith. In 2 Corinthians 11:24-27 Paul writes: "Five different times the Jewish leaders gave me thirty-nine lashes. Three times I was beaten with rods. Once I was stoned. Three times I was shipwrecked. Once I spent a whole night and a day adrift at sea. I have traveled on many long journeys. I have faced danger from rivers and from robbers. I have faced danger from my own people, the Jews, as well as from the Gentiles. I have faced danger in the cities, in the deserts, and on the seas. And I have faced danger from men who claim to be believers but are not. I have worked hard and long, enduring many sleepless nights. I have been hungry and thirsty and have often gone without food. I have shivered in the cold, without enough clothing to keep me warm." He goes on to say that he was given a thorn in his flesh and he begged God to take it away but the Lord said "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." Then Paul was glad to boast about his weaknesses, so that the power of Christ could work through him. (2 Corinthians 12:9)
      
If anyone faced hardships, Paul did. Can you imagine the joy on his face when he set out to sea and the devastation when the ship wrecked? Or the elation he felt when telling others of Jesus and the isolation when he was imprisoned alone? But, instead of giving up and falling into despair, he seized every opportunity to witness and encourage. "We can rejoice too, when we run into problems and trails, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment." (Romans 5: 2-5)

No matter who we are, how much education we have or money in our account, there is one thing we can bank on. Life will throw curve balls. It can have us soaring one minute and knock us to our knees the next. When our design for life's course derails, we must place our hope in the Lord. To trust every detour will bring us to a better place. That every shattered dream and ache in our heart will be used for God's greater glory. And that when we take our eyes off our circumstances and place them on Him, He will bring clarity to confusion and peace in the midst of pain.

Father in Heaven,
We thank you that though we can make our plans, you determine our steps.  You lead us beside still waters. You renew our strength and guide us along right paths. Forgive us when we doubt you. Help us to trust in your good and perfect will for us knowing that you can see the entire picture when we cannot.  In Jesus' name, Amen.

Parenting: Sunny Skies or Smog of Stress?

"I'm a bad mom." I said to myself after I raised my voice for what seemed like the 75th time a few days ago. The lie that first visited me slowly threatened to become a permanent resident.  It wasn't the first time and it won't be the last.

Let me set the stage a little bit.

My husband and I have five children together. We are a newly blended family discovering the difficulties of merging two households into one while also reaping the rewards of it. As with most children, ours will bicker over the most petty things. "She's staring at me." "He's being bossy." And on and on.

On this particular day, after a few hours of being around one another, the kids needed a break and so did I. I retreated to my bathroom and the tears flowed. Question after question flooded  my mind. "Why is this so hard?" "Am I cut out for this?" "Will it ever get better?"

I didn't get immediate answers to those questions so I just had to rest knowing God was right there with me.

Parenting is one of the most daunting jobs on the planet. We discipline our kids only to watch them repeat the same mistakes again and again. We'll instruct them on the way they should go and become disappointed when they veer in the opposite direction. We'll shower them with love and weep over disrespectful attitudes as they pull away with every year that passes.

With different ages come different stages. Lifting toddlers can be a back breaking task. The tempermental teenage years are emotionally exhausting. And, I'm told that even as our children become adults, we will worry about them just the same.

There's no doubt children are a gift from God. He's entrusted us with caring for another life. With the gift also comes the greatest responsibility. We are told to train them in the way they should go and bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. (Prov. 22:6; Ephesians 6:4) It sounds easy when we read it but doing it is anything but. Like us, children are born with their own sinful nature. They will love us and test us. Follow us and rebel. Come to think of it, isn't this what we do with our Father in heaven?

Very often I wonder if I have the energy to do this parenting thing another day. Between the cooking and cleaning, homework, taxi driving, pep talks and being a referee...It's draining. No, parenting isn't always sunny skies.  In fact, there are many days when the smog of stress will overcast the joy. When we want to pull the covers over our head and pray the day away.

But, just when I think I am at the end of my rope, God beckons for me to be still with Him.  It's then He reminds me that He's placed me here, for such a time as this. That I can lead these children because He is leading me. He alone is my strength and portion and He knows how I feel because He has children of his own.

As these truths are whispered in my heart, the doubts and anxieties begin to weaken and I thank God for another day. For the miracle and wonder of children. For giving me the opportunity to be a mom.


Heavenly Father,
Thank you for life and for the lives of all my children.  Please help me to have patience, strength and guidance as I lead them.  Help me to always point them to you.  Forgive me when I lose my cool or doubt your plan for our lives. I ask you to surround me with people who can encourage and uplift and help me to be that person for someone else.  In Jesus' name, Amen.

The New Normal

For the past few days, I've been turning in circles around our new home.  There's no background music nor am I practicing for Amercia's Got Talent. I've been spinning from room to room as I examine what needs to be done and, at the same time, not knowing what to do.

Two months ago, I was living in a different town, doing the same routine I had for years. I was engaged then but still in my  comfort zone. We were planning our new lives together and I was eager for my husband and I's family to merge into one. 

Life has been chaos for weeks with to do lists a mile long which left little time for much else. Boxes quickly became unpacked.  My husband went back to work and the kids back to school. It's left the house quiet for a few hours a day. In those wonderful moments when I am able to catch my breath, a question continues to enter my mind: "God, what do you want me to do?"

At first, I wondered why I had those thoughts. I'd received everything I prayed for. The man of my dreams, a great home to live in and all of us together as a family. So, why wasn't this enough?

In a home with five children, there's always something that needs to be cleaned and meals that need to be prepared but tomorrow will be the same thing.

The same question plagues again: "God, what do you want me to do?"

So much busy work has taken a front seat that I haven't paused long enough to hear His answer.

Today, I stopped and picked up the pen and paper I'd neglected for months and I wrote.

Suddenly, I heard God's response. "I have more I want you to do. Follow me, one day at a time, and I will show you." And, just like that, my eyes welled with tears as joy swelled within me and I smiled as I thought of my future and what the new normal is.

Each one of us have deep rooted desires. Maybe its to be a teacher, a baker, or a homemaker. For some of us, we don't know what we want to do, but we know we were made for more. The passion inside of us...the thing that keeps us up at night... that's what we should pursue.  The gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable. (Romans 11:29) With this in mind, may we constantly be in prayer that our God will make us worthy of his calling, and that by his power he may bring to fruition our desires for goodness and our every deed prompted by faith. (2 Thessalonians 1:11)

As i navigate through this new chapter and role in life, I can't help but wonder what God has in store. I'm walking blindly like so many of us often do. As scary as change can be, it's also the most exciting. If you are reading this and are in the midst of a new job, new role or if God is nudging you to venture out, know you aren't alone. Trust in The One who never leaves us, commit your actions to Him and He will make His plans  for your life succeed.

The Comfy Brown Couch

 

for Chad

 

 

In 2015, I wrote an article titled The Old Wooden Bench.  At the time, I was a single mom of two children. I discussed some of the hardships of being a single woman with a desire to be married. Please go back to my previous post and read it first so this makes more sense. The following article is an update of how life can change quicker than a snap of a finger when God rules your life and He says it’s time.

My heart raced as my car inched closer to his driveway. “What if there’s no chemistry?” “What if we have nothing to talk about?” “Have I set myself up to be let down again?”  These are all questions that fumbled around in my mind as I prepared to meet my blind date on that scorching June day in 2015.

What I didn’t know was that date would turn out to be the best one I’d ever had.  Hours seemed like minutes as we talked about life, children and goals for the future. When the hot summer sun gave way to the light of the moon and it was time to say good-bye, I knew I found someone special.

For several years prior, I cried out to God more times than I can count. I had the deepest desire for a companion.  One date after another always fell through and I asked myself what I was doing wrong. I questioned whether I would remain single for the rest of my life. There were times I felt God ignored me and times He spoke so loudly it was as if He were standing right next to me. Throughout all the highs and lows of those years, there was one thing I had no choice but to do. One thing the Lord constantly spoke. I needed to abide in Him and wait. My character was still being developed and my walk with God was still in infancy stage. 

Those who know me, know I’m not the most patient person around. I vividly remember getting off the bus the first week of kindergarten and crying to my mom because I had to stand in line for lunch. I didn’t like to wait then and it hasn’t gotten much better with age. Of course my creator knows this fact too and on many occasions has reminded me that He is just giving me what I prayed for-more patience.

Had I not gone through that time of learning how to trust and depend on the Lord, I wouldn’t be the person anyone was looking for and I wouldn’t be the wife I thought I was ready to be.

This past year has been such a magical, love story.  The blind date turned into a budding romance. Our relationship has been a natural progression from courtship to becoming exclusive to meeting each other’s children.  This has all transpired under the guidance of Jesus Christ. His hand has been at work the entire time and I continue to be grateful for this answered prayer.

A lot of women have that little girl that still lives inside her.  The one that longs for the fairy tale.  To meet her prince and live happily ever after. On Easter Sunday of 2016, that deep rooted dream became a reality when my boyfriend asked me to be his wife. Words can’t express the joy of knowing I will get to spend the rest of my days with the love of my life.

Does all this mean we haven’t hit a few bumps? Of course not. We have faced opposition and will continue to in some capacity.  It also doesn’t mean that when we are married all problems will fade away.  In fact, blending two families together will more than likely prove to be a challenge. However, our union will be one of strength and endurance and only because God, who is credited with crossing our paths, is our foundation.

We will always be in a season of waiting on something. It could be:

A mate.

Children.
A less stressful job.

A clean bill of health.

Lamentations 3:25 says: The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. We won’t always get what we want when we want it but God knows best what we need.  He rewards those who are faithful and His gifts will always be better than anything we could ask for or imagine.

The rotted wooden bench was restored and now shines from the front porch of my home. It symbolizes  what Jesus has done in my life. Funny thing is, my fiancé and I have never sat on that bench together.  We spend more time on his comfy brown couch and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

The Old Wooden Bench

There is an old wooden bench that sits in my back yard. A lot of use has come out of it. In fact, it used to be quite charming. It’s rotted now and the best use for it would be in a dump. It seems like just yesterday I was sitting on it, alongside someone. Now, it’s falling apart board by board.

If only I had a truck to haul it off, or better yet, if only I had a man in my life to rid it of its misery. But, I don’t.

Truth is, there’s many things around my house that could use repairing or tweaking. Many of which I’m not strong enough to tackle alone.

Most times, life is so busy that I forget about what’s being neglected. I rush by the broken porch, the swing set that’s falling apart, and the old bench that’s caving in. But, when I’m stilled, all of the broken things seem to come into focus. The reality of my singleness seems to be magnified. It makes me long for a husband. Not to just fix things around the house, but for the companionship - Someone to tell my innermost secrets to, and to sit on the bench with. Of course, if he wants, he can haul off the junk too.

There’s a deep desire in my heart-a desire that doesn't seem to go away.

During this season of singleness, my relationship with The Lord has grown by leaps and bounds. He has used this time to grow and mature me. Psalm 119:71 says, it was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn Your decrees. For that reason alone, I wouldn’t trade my lonely nights or tear stained pillows.

I certainly won’t sugarcoat it. It’s not always easy, but, it’s always been worth it. He wants good for both my family and me. I know God has purpose for this season of waiting. He isn’t holding back the very thing I desire most because it’s fun for Him, He’s doing it because He loves me that much. He’s teaching me how to rely on Him for everything.

Singles hear over and over, “Quit looking and you’ll find it” or “God is still preparing you.” While this may be true, we still tire of hearing it. So, my point of writing this is to let whoever can relate know, you are not alone. The feelings you have are real and you're not a lesser Christian by desiring companionship while you walk with the Lord. It’s okay to cry out to The Father.

We are fooling ourselves if we think that a husband or wife can bring us every bit of happiness that we feel is lacking in our aloneness. That’s a lot of pressure to put on someone, and, another person will never bring complete satisfaction. People will fail you. Sooner or later, that person who brings you flowers and makes your heart flutter will also be the one to hurt you or wrong you, not necessarily because they want to, but because they are human.

The Lord is our ultimate Companion. He wants to be the shoulders we lean on and the One who we tell our secrets to. He is the only One who can heal our loneliness. And, in addition to that, He wants to haul off our junk; our past, our failures, and our wounds. You can trust that God’s plans are bigger and better because "No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly." (Ps. 84:11 ESV)

So, the next time you're looking for someone to sit on the bench beside you, remember this, He’s already there.

Reflect:
Do you believe God loves you so much He wants His absolute best for you?
In what ways can you be of use for the kingdom during your season of singleness?

Goodbye, Muffin Top!

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7

There it was, this small, square, thin plate of glass staring at me on the bathroom floor. The scale and I have a love/hate relationship. Its powers do more than display my weight. Depending on what numbers pop up, that scale can solicit a smile or cause my shoulders to slump faster than a cheetah chasing its prey.

The pressure to be thin seems to start at an early age and has only intensified through modern technology. Social media, magazines and television brainwash us into thinking that beauty comes in the measurements of 36, 24, 36. We size ourselves up to airbrushed models or our thin best friend only to let discouragement and discontentment set in when we feel we cannot compare.

If we place more emphasis on our exterior rather than what God looks at, our confidence will come from the wrong source and will constantly change, like the numbers on a scale. But, if we are able to take our insecurities to the Lord, He will be our confidence. To keep our eyes on Christ will train our brains to think of ourselves the way He does-Wonderfully made. Set apart. Chosen. We can walk with certainty and self-assurance because of the One who lives inside us.

When the prophet Samuel searched for the next king of Israel, he was impressed with Jesse's son, Eliab. However, we read in our key verse the Lord said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." Of course we read on to find that it was David, a young shepherd boy, who not only defeated Goliath the giant, but who God raised up as king, not Eliab.

David didn't stand in front of a mirror and say I'm too small to slay a giant. He didn't look at his brothers and think they were more masculine and better fit to do the job. He boldly stepped up in the name of the Lord Almighty because he knew God was with him!

When we show compassion, remain humble, have gratitude and spread love we cultivate the gentle, gracious kind of inner beauty that God delights in. 

It's fine to want a nice appearance and exercise is good for the body. Goodbye, Muffin Top! Our bodies are our temples and we should take care of them. However, we shouldn't allow size and/or comparison to dictate our self worth or our mood. We are handcrafted, custom designed and one-of-a-kind.  We should think of ourselves as nothing less. 

Prayer

Father, you are perfect in all of your ways. You created me in your image and have made no mistakes in doing so. When self-doubt threatens to consume me, turn my gaze from the mirror and onto you.  In Jesus' name, amen.

Chasing Butterflies

(1 Timothy 6:6 NIV) But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it.

A few months ago, I watched my daughter, who was then four years old, run behind a duck that had made his way onto the boardwalk at the beach. Of course he didn’t let her latch onto him but it sure was entertaining to watch her try.

This triggered thoughts of all the people and things I’ve pursued in my own life. As a small child I dashed behind butterflies. As a hormone crazed teen, it was boys. In my early twenties, it was the latest trends. After I had my first child, I darted after him.  Most everything I tried to obtain brought a lot of satisfaction that never lasted.

At the ripe age of 33, I found myself empty, broken, and lost.  All the running left my heart invigorated but my soul depleted. On a quest to find what was missing, I soon discovered the only One I needed to chase didn’t need to be caught because He had been with me all my life. We can have everything money can buy with the white picket fence and 2.5 kids and still have an ache from the hollow space within.  That hole can only be filled by obeying and abiding in Jesus Christ. His word says those who hunger and thirst for righteousness will be filled. (Matt. 5:6)

Most of us want the same things in life: to find purpose and be happy. The world will promise we will find it by saying things such as do what makes you feel good. Buy the new car. Find love. Travel the world. While these can bring temporary gratification, they will not bring permanent fulfillment. The shiny new car will eventually dull, we’ll find out our significant other is imperfect like us, and our stamped passports will collect dust.

We were created by God and for God and our sole purpose is to glorify Him.  Anything short of that will leave us with an exhausted ego constantly in search for more. Our key verse says: But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and we can take nothing out of it.  Godliness means to be Christ like. When we strive to be more like Him in our thoughts and actions then we are pursuing much more than happiness but rather holiness. When we do, we learn to be content with whatever we have in whatever situation we are in. Contentment in God produces the gain we all want which is joy. Not to be confused with the momentary delight of chasing things like butterflies and BMW's. No, He brings everlasting joy! The kind we get just to be in His presence where at His right hand are pleasures forevermore. (Ps. 16:11) 

Reflect:
How many times have you chased someone or something in hopes of finding happiness only to be left with unmet expectations?

Have you asked God to take over your life so you can experience perpetual joy?

One Day Closer

This post was written in 2015. Though it is a year old, it still rings true and always will. Happy Birthday in Heaven, Bubba!



One of the most miserable, agonizing feelings is the separation from a loved one.
In 2014, I was 7,000 miles away from my children and was only able to talk to them once in eleven days. On the day I arrived home from my trip, I couldn’t put my arms around them fast enough! Though it seemed it had been an eternity, once I held them, it was as if no time had passed. I went from glum to glee immediately.

Today, my brother would’ve blown out 34 birthday candles. I wonder how he would’ve turned out. If the girls would still be chasing him or would he have settled down. I imagine my children jumping all over him and laughing as he was doing one of his famous impersonations.

It’s been almost 11 years since he passed and there is still a pang in my heart. Remembering him is bitter sweet for thinking of happy times spent together is followed by the ache of his absence. Birthdays, holidays and anniversaries often trigger the pain of loved ones who are gone. Days like today forces me to look at my own mortality. Death is just a part of life. It’s avoided in everyday conversation yet the Bible says our lives are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. (James 4:14)

What do these two different circumstances have in common? The sorrow is temporary. For those who believe in the death and resurrection of Christ, we look at each day that passes as one day closer to being in our eternal home-with Jesus. We know there are better 
things waiting for us that will last forever. (Hebrews 10:32)

As I reflect on the past with fond memories, I anticipate even greater ones to come. I envision colors no eye has seen. Water as clear as crystal. Thousands upon thousands of angels singing in harmony to our King on the throne. A place free of war. Famine. Natural disasters. Murderers. Disease. Where every tear will be wiped from our eyes. (Revelation 21:4) Where we won’t need the light of a lamp for the Lord God will be all the light we need. (Rev. 22:5)

Oh, How I long to be home. Can you picture it?

For those who have loved ones now departed, time may ease the pain but it doesn’t make you miss them less. It’s okay to still have sad days. Weeping may last through the night but joy comes in the morning. (Ps. 30:5) Fix your eyes on the Father and dwell not in the temporary. And, when the longing for our loved one seems to be unbearable, just know a reunion is in the works…until then, let’s get our party hats ready to celebrate.

A Life in Snapshots

Yes, God, your God, dried up the Jordan’s waters for you until you had crossed, just as God, your God, did at the Red Sea, which had dried up before us until we had crossed. This was so that everybody on earth would recognize how strong God’s rescuing hand is and so that you would hold God in solemn reverence always. Joshua 4: 23-24 MSG

We can tell a lot of one’s life by glancing at photographs. They tell a story. From a baby’s first arrival into the world to high school graduation to wedding days and beyond. The commonality in most pictures is the subject normally wears a smile.  If someone were to go through my old photos they would probably think I was the happiest person on the planet.

But, pictures only allow us to see what we want them to. I can’t think of anyone that wants to capture a moment of despair. Why? Because we don’t want to remember it.  The essence of snapshots is to freeze time so we can fondly look back at happy memories and pass those down to our loved ones.

I scrolled through images the other day and as I looked at each one I was instantly taken back to that exact time and place. With some of them, I remember a disagreement that had occurred earlier in the day or tears that were shed hours before it was taken. As time passes and I glance at them again, it’s not the conflicts I’ll recollect but rather the people that were with me during those times and how, with God, we overcame the obstacles.

This reminds me of the twelve stones of memorial in the book of Joshua. Joshua begins by the Lord charging him to lead the Israelites across the Jordan River into new land. The Lord tells him to be strong and courageous because He would remove their enemies from the land and He would be with them. The priests, carrying the Ark of the Lord, led the way. As soon as their feet were placed in the Jordan, its waters were cut off and the river stood up like a wall. All the people then crossed the river on dry land. Afterward, the Lord told Joshua to place twelve stones at the place they crossed as a memorial to the people of Israel to serve as a lasting sign of God’s work. Joshua said in the future their children would ask what the stones meant and he instructed the Israelites to tell them the story. The story of God’s might, presence and the promises He kept. How He did it so everyone on earth would recognize the Lord’s hand is powerful and they would hold God in solemn reverence always.

We will all go through our own Jordan Rivers at some point. We’ll probably take a selfie before and after it but unlikely will we do it in the middle. It’s the hard times no one else sees that builds our character and makes us who we are. When we feel so weak we must rely on God’s strength. When we don’t see a way out and God pulls us through. Not many smiling faced portraits then. But Oh, when we make it to the other side! We may look a little more run down and our knees might be a little more beaten up but the testimony we’ll give will be worth it to tell our children. The story of a good Father who was with us and delivered us into our promised land.

Heavenly Father,

You, who created life knows ours from birth to death. Every smiling face and hidden tear. Your word says you are always with us and fighting for us. Help us to remember that. On the days we are happy enough to take a photo, remind us that it is your delight to see us joyful. During the times we feel the weight of the world on our shoulders, wrap us into your arms and help us rest in your promise of deliverance. Thank you God that no matter how we are feeling, you are there.  In Jesus' name, Amen.