The Gift of Compassion

 

"He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and familiar with grief; like one from whom people hide their faces, he was despised, and we esteemed him not." — Isaiah 53:3

“It doesn’t feel like Christmas, Mom,” my thirteen-year-old said recently. I suggested it might be because she’s getting older. When we’re children, there’s a magical quality to Christmastime. Excitement fills the air as we imagine twinkling lights, warm sugar cookies, and shiny gifts beneath the tree. But as we grow up, life becomes more complicated—sometimes in wonderful ways, and sometimes not.

For those blessed with children of their own, the “magic” of Christmas can reappear as we experience it through their eyes. But children grow up too, and eventually, we may find ourselves back in a place where Christmas doesn’t feel quite as joyful or “Christmassy” (if that’s even a word) as it once did.

We all navigate different seasons of life. Perhaps you’re a young adult overwhelmed with little ones and haven’t had the time or energy to put up the tree. Maybe you’re in midlife, watching your children leave the nest, too busy, or uninterested in helping with the decorations. Or perhaps you’ve reached a point where climbing the stairs to get the tree feels impossible, and you’ve decided not to bother at all.

But no matter what season of life you’re in, there’s one constant truth we can cling to: Jesus is the reason for the season. Matching pajamas, nostalgic movies, and handmade ornaments may bring smiles, but they are not the heart of Christmas. Jesus Christ came to this earth for you and me, offering the greatest gift—Himself. In addition to giving us the gift of salvation, He blesses us with the Gift of Compassion this Christmas.

Isaiah 53:3 describes Him as a man of sorrows, familiar with grief. The New Testament reveals how Jesus fulfilled this prophecy. In John 1:11, we see how He was rejected: “He came to that which was His own, but His own did not receive Him.” Luke 22:44 describes the agony He endured in the Garden of Gethsemane: “And being in anguish, He prayed more earnestly, and His sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.” On the cross, His grief is laid bare in Matthew 27:46, as He cries out, “My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?”

Jesus is no stranger to sorrow or suffering. He knows what it means to feel pain, rejection, and loneliness. Wherever you find yourself this Christmas—whether joyful or grieving, surrounded by loved ones or feeling alone—Jesus is with you. He came into the world to walk among us, share in our trials and triumphs, and bring us hope and salvation. In Him, we are never truly alone. We find comfort and compassion—gifts that endure through every season of life.

Missed Moments

 

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.   Lamentations 3:22-23

As soon as my eyes opened wide, I mindlessly scrolled through my phone. 

I messed up today, Lord. Priorities already misaligned.

 

Woke the kids up for school and spilled coffee on my shirt.

Put a dirty dish in the fridge and dropped my laptop in the dirt.

 

No time to read my Bible this morning, so I listened through the app in the car.

Slammed the brakes just in time. I didn’t see the animal from afar. 

 

Pulled up to the school and yelled at my daughter for no reason.

Tried to make myself feel better by saying: it’s only this crazy season.

 

Frazzled and annoyed, I sat down at my desk.

While secretly wishing I had more time to rest.

 

Lost in work and emails and scratching off to-dos.

I sighed a little loud and wondered, God, where are you?

 

He answered back, but I didn’t hear

The worship music was too loud in my ear.

 

Tired of making tacos for dinner, I stopped by the store for a rotisserie and a side.

Rushing home to beat the clock, my stress was hard to hide.

 

Thank you, Lord, for this day and the food we share.

Surround us with Your comfort and peace beyond compare.

Homework and chores, watching The Voice, and more.

All the while, I missed the moments He knocked on my heart’s door. 

 

I asked myself why I felt as though He wasn’t there.

I listened to music, His Word, and said a quick prayer.

 

The house grew quiet as the day came to an end

It occurred to me I had been too busy to let God in.

 

I found my quiet corner, closed my eyes, and sat awhile

That’s when He told me He had been there through every trial. 

 

He said He hadn’t gone anywhere or moved.

It was me too worried about staying in my groove.

 

I messed up today, Lord. I put everything before You. 

God replied, “it’s okay, every morning my mercies are new.”

 

I will need help tomorrow to pause and breathe in Your grace.

Please help me make space for You in the busiest place.

 

 

 

 

Christmas (in the South) Is In The Air!

Seventy-degree weather and very light sweaters 

with lights aglow as children can only dream of snow.

Christmas (in the South) is in the air!

Santa and Rudolph are placed on the roof up high 

with a hey y'all from the passers-by.

Christmas (in the South) is in the air!

Decorations put out before Thanksgiving as the neighbors tease us

Setting up the nativity, but we can't find baby Jesus.

Christmas (in the South) is in the air!

The heat and AC sing a duet

as we drink hot chocolate, trying not to break a sweat.

Christmas (in the South) is in the air!

Listening to carols sung by the fire

as we swat at the bugs just slightly higher.

Christmas (in the South) is in the air!

Making Grandma's macaroni and sweet potato casserole for dinner

while we complain about how we wish we were thinner.

Christmas (in the South) is in the air!

Watching Christmas Vacation for the 50th time

with a glass of sweet tea as we quote every line.

Christmas (in the South) is in the air! 

Attending Christmas services in our best attire, 

battling allergies, so we turn on the humidifier. 

Christmas (in the South) is in the air! 

Merry Christmas, y'all!

Becoming a Military Mom

 

It’s two days before Christmas, and the house is currently empty, so I took advantage of the quiet moments and began reading Be Safe, Love Mom this morning. The book is written by a mom of four whose children serve in different U.S. military branches. It was a recommended read by a mom who has long been on this journey that we are soon approaching.

From an early age, I knew my son wouldn’t go down the college route. Jeremy despised school. There were many parent-teacher conferences in those early years, and most teachers commented that Jeremy was too impulsive, un-focused, and disruptive to the class but had a heart of gold. I remember saying, “if I can just get him to graduate high school.” That’s how those thoughts ended for me, as I wasn’t sure what would come next for him. There wasn’t an urgency to have anything figured out back then, as time was on our side. As he matured, his character proved to be one I am very proud of. We often talked about the military as he grew, and I felt he would do well in that, but I couldn’t give much advice as I had never been a part of a military family. In 2016, I married a man who served twelve years in the Air Force. My husband, Chad, has helped guide Jeremy much better than I could regarding enlisting and everything related to that way of life. I am so thankful for the example Chad has set for him. By Jeremy’s junior year, when asked, “what do you want to do after high school?” the answer has consistently been to join the Armed Forces.

Parenting includes so many moments of continually releasing our children, little by little, until one day you wake up and it’s their senior year. And here we are… 6 months before he graduates high school. He will swear into the United States Navy next month and head to boot camp this July. I have six months left with him before life as we know it will change. All the years of teaching, correcting, disciplining, and praying led to where we are right now. He will step into unknown territory just as all kids do when they leave the nest. There are so many life lessons that happen in that transition. More than just living independently, this will be a new way of life for him. He will learn leadership skills, the importance of teamwork, and what words like honor, service, and country genuinely mean. And it will be a new way of life at home and figuring out what comes next.

As I flipped through the book I was reading, I stumbled upon a receipt from August 2015, when it was originally purchased. My mind drifted to who this person was, and I somehow felt strangely connected to them. I recently joined a few Facebook groups for military moms and realized I am not alone. I think of the hundreds of thousands of children who have joined the service to leave their families and the comforts of home behind. I think of the moms who have stood proud as they wave their children goodbye, only to shed tears in their empty bedrooms. I think of graduation day and seeing him in his uniform for the first time. Becoming a military mom has simultaneously ignited feelings of pride, worry, fear, excitement, and sadness. I’m proud he wants to serve his country and worry over the what if’s that haven’t even happened. I’m excited for his future but sad this chapter is ending.

If I’m not careful, I can let the grief of letting go and the worry over the future consume me, which doesn’t change circumstances or help anything. Or I can look at it from another perspective. In all His goodness, the Lord gifted me with my son, whom He loves far more than I can imagine. Yes, he is my earthly son, but Jeremy belongs to God as all His children do. He has written my son’s story and, thankfully, is in complete control over every facet of his life. I must trust that God's grip will remain as I release my grip to let him spread his wings.

I guess it turns out that Jeremy isn't the only one with much to learn, as I am learning how to rely on God through this season of change. I am sure no one can better understand than the One who gave his only Son for us all.

Two Good Choices

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. 

Romans 12:2 (NIV)

Have you ever heard the expression “when God closes a door, He opens a window?” It’s simply saying that God can position us in such a way, whether through approval or rejection, that brings about the results He wants for us. 

I remember a time when I was in a very comfortable place in life. No sooner than I got there that another opportunity presented itself. What was different about this situation was I found myself at a crossroads faced with two good choices. Ever been there?

It would have been much easier if there was a clear direction I was to take. So, what happens if both windows are open at the same time? 

Indecisiveness camped out and I found myself restless. As I did everything I knew to do: prayed without ceasing, read the Bible, made a pros and cons list and consulted wise counsel, it dawned on me that even though I did all the checklist items, I was in my own way.  I hadn't let HIM do the work in me.  

Our goal, as Christians, is to become more like Christ.  This is so often a process that happens over time, unveiled by peeling back layer after layer. Every circumstance we go through will hopefully be a teaching lesson to mature us so we can discern what is best. So, I asked the Lord what He wanted me to learn from this. As I did, He began to sift ugly things out of me. Things like selfishness and worry.  He was also teaching me to lean on and seek Him as I sought the answer. 

Though we may question, doubt and struggle to find the right answers, He is there through all of it. As long as we are thinking biblically and living obediently, we are in the will of God. He is sovereign and He is more than capable of using any and every situation, decision we make or person we encounter to fulfill His perfect plan for our lives.

Prayer
Father, thank you for the freedom of choice and opportunities you have given me. I don’t want to be anywhere or do anything that is outside of your will. I ask for wisdom and clarity as I seek You.  I trust that no matter what, you will get me exactly where I am supposed to be.  In Jesus’ name, amen. 

Should've, Could've, Would've

“Strength and honor are her clothing, and she can laugh at the time to come.” Proverbs 31:25 (CSB)

The door opened at 14,000 feet! With someone strapped onto my back, I prepared to plunge to my death. Or, so I thought. Tears streamed down my cheeks as we inched our way to the door. “NO!" I screamed. There was no way I could jump out of that plane. One step is all it would take but I clung to the door until my knuckles were white. Apparently, the skydiving instructor thought I said go instead of no and suddenly we were free falling at a rate of 120 mph! I had difficulty breathing and I was sure I'd be in the arms of Jesus in less than 5 minutes.

After what seemed like 5 hours of plummeting, a single cord was pulled and a bright colored umbrella sprouted out above us. We sailed through the sky and in that moment I was able to take in the magnificent beauty that was all around. Once my feet hit the ground, a wave of accomplishment washed over me. "I did it. I conquered my fear!" I yelled and laughed with excitement at the same time.

I don't ever desire to jump out of a plane again but I'm glad I had enough boldness to conquer that fear. I'm even more happy that the instructor knew what he was doing and that God spared our lives.

We are faced with choices daily. A lot of them are insignificant, such as what kind of cereal to eat for breakfast or shirt to wear to the office. It's the crucial decisions that can stop us dead in our tracks and leave us with a lot of should’ve, could’ve, would’ves. I should’ve taken the job offer. I could’ve gone back to school. If only I would’ve written that book or (fill in the blank). Many of us want to take chances and chase dreams but we fear the unknown.

Here's a spoiler alert: we will all make what we feel is the wrong choice at some point. But, followers of Jesus can take comfort in knowing that the Lord will fulfill his promises for us. (Ps. 138:8) He created each of us with gifts, strengths and weaknesses that He uses in His plan to build His kingdom. As we daily strive to walk in obedience to El Shaddai (God Almighty), He will get us where He wants us to be. Much like the tandem skydiving instructor who knows when to pull the parachute out and guide us to our destination.

Reflect
What fear(s) hold you back from making a big decision? How might God use the choice you make to ultimately have more of an eternal impact?

Traditions

 

Meet Christopher, the elf. He's eleven years old, but in elf years, more like 60. He hibernates 11 months out of the year, loves to ride on ceiling fans and can be quite mischievous at night. Or, at least he used to be. Christopher was adopted by our family when my son was five years old. An immediate friendship was born between the two of them. The elf went everywhere my son went. Each year, when Christmastime was over, Christopher would  have to say goodbye and when he did, left a sad little boy behind. 

A few years later, Mittens, the girl elf, was adopted by my daughter. Later, the tiny elf, Bob, Jr joined the family. For many years, this was one of my most favorite traditions at Christmastime. I couldn't wait to see the kids reactions when they arose each morning to see what those silly elves had gotten themselves into!

Fast forward a couple of years. My 16 year old son is now juggling school, work and a social life. Gone are the days of make believe where elves bathe in marshmallows. Oh, how I wish time could be stored in a bottle, as I'm sure most of us do.  There was even a song written about it many years ago (thank you, Jim Croce). The more time passes, the more old practices are harder to continue. For instance, out of 42 Thanksgivings I have been able to celebrate, around 40 of them were spent at my grandma's house. Except this past Thanksgiving. My Nana is 91 years old and though she would like to, she doesn't cook anymore. So, I decided it was time to start a new tradition. This year we hosted Thanksgiving at our home. I hope it will be the start of many more to come. It was different but turned out great! It dawned on me that the memories I had tied to  previous Thanksgiving celebrations were mine and not my children's. I want them to have their own special memories to reflect back on.  

As my son outgrew his sidekick,  old traditions gave way to new ones. Things change. Children grow up. Families move. Change can be hard but it can also be refreshing if we have the right perspective.

Wherever we may find ourselves this Christmas, whether driving around to look at lights or we're in unfamiliar territory, let us not lose sight of why we celebrate. Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, entered this dark world to be the light everyone of us need. HE is the reason we sing "Joy to the World" and "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" year after year. Those traditional songs that never get old and never change. As HE never changes. Praise God!

Back to the elf. Christopher has lost an eye and has a terrible skin condition now but he still comes around. A few days ago, I helped him sit in a common area in the house because I didn't know if the poor thing would be able to make it. However, today I wandered into my son's room while he was at school and noticed Christopher was there. I didn't help him get in there. The only thing I can figure is that maybe we don't outgrow everything, no matter how old we are. Turns out this may be a tradition with no expiration date and that makes this mama's heart happy!