Good Choice vs. Good Choice

When we are single, making decisions can seem easier because we have the privilege to choose whatever we want. With the freedom also comes the burden of bearing the consequences, whether good or bad - alone or what seems to feel like we are alone.

Let me explain further. When I was married, my ex-husband and I were a sounding board for each other. We compromised and rationalized and even if we did not agree on a certain matter, there was comfort in knowing we had one another’s back.

I've been a single mom for the past three years, which has included hundreds of decisions. Though I often seek wise counsel, the weight can, at times, seem overwhelming.

Several weeks ago, a curve ball hit. I was in a very comfortable place in my life when Wham! God called me out of it.  No warning. I found myself at a crossroads faced with two good choices that would not only affect me but my children and quite possibly the direction our lives would go. However, I knew that, as Lysa TerKeurst so eloquently put it, there was a best yes.

As the restlessness continued in my heart, I found myself wrestling with God. I straddled the fence, having one foot on the old and familiar and the other on the new and unknown. I second-guessed myself for weeks on end and did everything I knew to do. I prayed consistently, read the Bible and asked for advisement from those who had been in my shoes before.

A good versus bad choice would be much easier than a good versus good. Because of that, indecisiveness camped out.

Pretty soon it dawned on me that though I did all the checklist items, I was in my own way.  I hadn't let HIM do the work in me.  Our goal, as Christians, is to become more like Christ.  This is so often a process that happens over time, unveiled by peeling back layer after layer. Every circumstance we go through will hopefully be a teaching lesson to mature us so we can discern what is best until the day of Christ. (Philippians 1:10)  So, I asked the Lord: "what do you want me to learn through this?"

As I sought God’s heart, he began to sift some pretty ugly things out of mine such as my motives and the worry that filled me because I hadn't fully trusted Him.  

When the muck is filtered out, it allows direction to become crystal clear.

Eventually, the answer came, as it always does when we earnestly seek the Lord’s will for our lives.  It’s always on time…His perfect time. 

Though we may question, doubt and struggle to find the right answers, He is there through all of it. No matter what stage of life we're in, we are never alone. When we aren’t sure what to do, we must actively wait by seeking Him. If anxiety threatens to consume us, we combat that by knowing God is in control and placing full trust in Him. And, if we find ourselves at a point of two good decisions, choose the one that will stretch an grow us bringing Him more glory and honor.

Heavenly Father, thank you for the freedom of choice.  Please forgive me when I move ahead of you and try to take the reins.  I don’t want to be anywhere or do anything that is outside of your will.  If I should make a mistake, I trust that you will get me to exactly where I am supposed to be.  In Jesus’ name, Amen. 

Click below to listen to Colton Dixon's new song: "Through all of It." It's been a blessing to me and I hope it will for you all as well.

A Light For My Path

“Do my eyes look Chinese?” is what my nine year old asked one Monday morning as he stumbled his way to the kitchen table. Before sitting down, he dimmed the overhead lights until his eyes were fully open. About that same time, my daughter made her way to the bathroom and said “don’t turn on the lights, I can’t see.” What an oxymoron that is.

We all know light is needed for most of us to make our way around in the dark.  But for some of us, we have been in the pitch-black so long it’s all we know and what we’re use to. If we stay there, it will leave us blinded by the light and obscured to the truth of God’s plan for our lives.

I was in that sunless, somber place for a while.  My later teens and early twenties were spent in the wrong places making poor decisions.  I remember being the life of the party when in reality there was no life inside me at all. I had heard the truth of Jesus and yet I chose to turn away from Him. Like I did, there are those, who rebel against the light (Jesus), who do not know its ways or stay in its paths. (Job 24:13). He allowed me to make my own decisions and in so doing, consequences always followed. And they always will.

Why would so many of us choose the painful dark road of obstruction rather than walk on the illuminating path of righteousness? It could be a number of reasons:

Familiarity - Even if we know what we’re doing is wrong, if it’s all we know, we will continue doing it.  Romans 7:15 says “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.”

Fear – We may be afraid that our mistakes will be made known. The truth is we are all sinners saved by grace.  Our omniscient God already knows everything we’ve ever done or will do. Even so, there is nothing we can do to separate the love He has for us. We may also fear we won’t have fun anymore.  So many people that aren’t walking with the Lord seem to think the Christian life is boring.  However, living a life completely sold out to Christ will be anything but.  

Fleshly desires –We’re human beings born with sinful, selfish ways. Temptations are at every turn with a constant battle against the flesh and the Spirit. But, God is faithful; he will not let us be tempted beyond what we can bear and will also provide a way out so we can endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

Hindsight is 20/20. Looking back over the course of my life, God orchestrated so many people I crossed paths with to continually point me to Him. Though some of those divine encounters may have felt their words were falling on deaf ears, they helped teach me who this magnificent beacon, Jesus Christ, was.  They were able to shine because Christ shown through them.  Their lives impacted me even though it took many years for me to realize it.

We, who have accepted Jesus, have that same light inside and should let it shine before men in such a way they see good works and glorify our Father in heaven. (Matthew 5: 14-16)

For those who have felt imprisoned to bleak, painful nights, the bond has been paid and freedom to walk in the light of day is for the taking. Being a follower of Jesus does not mean we won’t face hard times, because we will. However, if we use His word as a lamp to guide our feet and a light for our path, we’ll find it much easier to maneuver.

Most majestic heavenly Father, I thank you for never leaving me though I so often leave you.  Thank you for the people you have placed in my life that beam with your truth.  Help me to be a light that extinguishes the dark and ignites others for you. In Jesus’ name, Amen.